So this blog post is just a short one where I express my feelings, thoughts and concerns on the next chapter of my journey of motherhood- Becoming a mummy of 2 boys! 👨👩👦👦❤️
As the date is approaching really quickly (I’m 30 weeks and 4 days pregnant to be exact 😁). I’ve started to think more and more about what on earth will my life be like with 2 children. (A toddler and a newborn 😳). This past week, I’ve really been doubting myself with questions like, Will I be able to juggle two kids? What if I don’t give enough attention to my first child, Will I be able to keep up with it all? Lol YES! I know I know- my mind is racing a million miles per hour. It doesn’t happen every day, but questions like this do pop up every now and then. (Hubby keeps telling me that it’s normal to think like this, and it can also be hormones as my emotions have been up and down lately). The “Joys” of a nervous pregnant mother! 😜
Don’t get me wrong guys- I’m soooo excited and grateful to be having another baby. I’ve always wanted to have a big family. I just feel that I’ve worked so hard at juggling everything in the past year and a half that I fear that all this will be turned upside down once the baby arrives. To be honest, I know once the baby arrives everything will change, it will be a little hard at the beginning, (sleep deprivation come at me! Lol). This will hopefully all pass once we settle in and get used to our second bundle of joy. I’ve become a little cray cray with my routine with Mateo, that I’m a little afraid of that being disrupted. (Crazy thoughts I know, but I’m just being honest).
I think the thing that is really starting to freak me out is the birth itself. Labour isn’t something that any mother looks forward to. (Especially if the first time around wasn’t a good experience – Has anyone had a pleasant labour? I would love to know! 😊). I’ve been working on my birth plan the last couple of days and have decided to do a few things different to the first time. Getting the epidural is one of those things which I didn’t want the first time around. 😳😳 Everyone has their own theories and decisions on what they want to do when in labour, and by no means don’t let me influence you on what decisions to make. When I was pregnant with Mateo, I really really didn’t want the epidural because I just wanted to experience a natural birth. That I bloody did! 😳 To be honest, I’m really grateful that I did and I wouldn’t change it now. (At least I know what our mother’s had to go through). This time around I just want it to be a little more smooth sailing (if that’s even possible) and I have decided that an epidural is the way to go for ME!
My first born
When Mateo entered this world I seriously dropped everything in my life to guide and teach him everything I could (obviously this will never stop). My attention was on him all day/every day and nothing els seemed to phase me. I’ve calmed down with all this and have surprisingly taken a little step back to let him learn some things on his own without being his shadow. His starting to be my shadow now ahaha. Having another child I fear will give me less time to focus on him and it makes me sad to think this. While we have a lot of family members that he gets plenty of attention from (literally his the first grandchild from both sides of the family). I still get sad sometimes thinking I won’t have enough time for him like I do now.
Well there you go, these are just some of my thoughts on becoming a mother of 2. (Of course I have positive ones too). I just thought by writing a quick post of what some of my fears are at the moment, it may help other mother’s that may be feeling the same way. I know that everything always works itself out. (I truly do believe it does). I hope this reassures mother’s out there that all these thoughts are normal and we all feel them sometimes. I’m so very excited (and nervous as you can tell) and can not wait for my little baby boy to arrive. This pregnancy has seriously flown so fast and it’s actually becoming so real now that in 2 months times- I will be a mummy of 2! 😁😁😁😁👨👩👦👦